Technology, Relationships and Night Shift

4 Aug

So, I haven’t posted anything these last couple of days.  My Love is on his long stretch of days off, which means that I’m spending less (read: almost no) time on the computer, and more time interacting with him or cuddled beside him reading a book while he catches up on his man-soaps (read: Wrestling).  I approach these long stretches of time with mixed emotion.

For the most part, I look forward to them, because with him working 12-hour days (or nights, depending on the cycle we’re in), I don’t get to spend much time with him, but it always brings with it a sense of frustration, because I work so hard to post on a somewhat regular basis, and these long stretches of inactivity bring my stats down to a depressingly low level.

I make a concentrated effort to make sure my stats improve every week.  This can only be accomplished by having more visitors each week than the week before.  This long stretch of days with no posts severely lowers the number of visitors, and makes it appear that I ‘forget’ about my blog, and post inconsistently.

While that last part is actually true, it’s not as true as it appears in my stats because there are many days that I would have posted, but have intentionally stayed away from  the computer, so it isn’t encroaching on quality time between myself and my Love.  If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that putting anything between yourself and your family is the fastest way to lose it.  Technology especially, because it sucks you into it so subtly that you don’t realize you’re in too deep until it’s too late.  Both my Love and myself have allowed technology draw us in almost to the exclusion of everything else before, and have suffered the consequences of it, and we both are overly cautious of allowing that to happen again.

When one of us says ‘Hey, you’re spending a little too much time on <insert technology here- phone, computer, etc.>’, the other will balk and deny it, but we will put it away, because we realize what’s really being said is ‘Hey, I’m feeling neglected.’  We both realize it for the warning sign that it is; that we aren’t paying enough attention to our relationship and, no matter what seems so important to us, we know that in reality it’s not more important than each other.  Yes, it is important to me that people see my blog as something that isn’t fly-by-night- but not more important to me than he is.  While I feel regret that I cannot post five or six days a week, I will never look back and regret the loss of a few potential readers more than the loss of happiness in my relationship.

I don’t mean to sound flippant when referring to my readers.  I hope you all understand that you are important to me, and that if it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t bother to write; that when I see that my daily views have gone down to five or less, I feel guilty because I feel as though I am disappointing you.  I value each of you, and appreciate that you take the time out of your daily lives to read what I have to say.

I’m hoping that, in time, I will be able to write enough posts to save in ‘reserve’ that when these long periods of inactivity approach, I can simply set my reserved posts to publish whether I am here or not.  While this presents the problem of not being here to reply to comments, I feel that if I preclude the automatic posts with a note letting you all know that it is ‘that time again’… I’m pretty sure that everyone will understand.

These week-long absences are actually the adjustment period between working day-shift and working night-shift for my Love.  Since I sleep when he sleeps, what this means for YOU is that I will be posting in the middle of the night for the next six to seven weeks, instead of during the day.  I haven’t decided if I am going to simply set my posts not to go live until the morning, or if I will post them at night and hope you all find them.  More than likely, it will be a mixture of the two, so don’t be surprised if I don’t reply to comments until the next day.  I’m not ignoring you, I’m sleeping. 🙂

Thank you all for sticking with me through the craziness!

4 Responses to “Technology, Relationships and Night Shift”

  1. Joshua Bagby at 5:33 pm #

    I can relate to this. When my blog post unexpectedly went “Freshly Pressed,” I experienced a wave of new readers and with it felt the responsibility to keep posting and commenting. It was quickly overwhelming, not only for what it brought me in terms of fresh attention, but all the mental stimulation of discovering other people’s great blogs — yours included. I still haven’t caught up. “Craziness” describes it well.

    That said, I congratulate you and your love on drawing some lines on the use of technology in favor of attending to your relationship. That is the most important priority. I have memories of times I wish I would have taken my advice.


    • KraftedKhaos at 4:15 am #

      Josh, thank you for the comment. Yes, technology, as near as it can bring all of us to each other, can easily become a wedge between us and those we should be closest to. I enjoy so much ‘meeting’ new people I never would otherwise know exist, I sometimes find myself caught up in this ‘alternate reality’ that is the interwebz and need a nudge to remind me that I’m not paying enough attention to my own life. Now, it appears that I will have that nudge every few weeks, whether I need it or not, lol!


  2. PinotNinja at 9:23 pm #

    Wrestling = man soaps! Hahahaha! So accurate yet hilarious.

    Don’t worry about the stats or posting. Your life comes first. This blog is just something fun you do to keep yourself creative and challenged. We’ll all be here whenever you decide to pop in, and we’ll miss you, but will understand, when you’re off doing your own thing.


    • KraftedKhaos at 4:31 am #

      PN, thanks! I think it’s funny too, and I never watched it before I met him, but I must admit that I’ll often find my attention drawn to the screen by whatever the current drama is. I guess it’s easier to join ’em if you can’t beat ’em after all 😉

      and thanks for the vote of confidence! I use my stats to keep me motivated to find something to write about, even when there seems to be nothing going on… a challenge against myself, I suppose. My second blog post here, I stated several reasons why the odds were against me succeeding, and I’ve struggled ever since then to beat them, as a matter of pride in myself and in something I created. Besides, I fight better when I’m the underdog and the odds are against me, lol. Thanks for being in my corner!


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